


Who needs adventures?

by Zoids Fanatic



Category: Zoids
Genre: Humor, Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-07-17
Updated: 2011-07-17
Packaged: 2015-03-26 03:50:43
Rating: K+
Chapters: 1
Words: 540
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7189991/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/2471570/Zoids-Fanatic
Summary: A one-shot/crack/sarcastic-parody fic. When I arrive in the world of Zoids, what do I do? Not go risk my life on some adventure, of course not. Rather, I make an invention. Read to find out.





	Who needs adventures?

(A/N: We all love self-insert fics, don't we? Well, this is fic is an example of why I should never write another self-insert, ever. And for those of you who don't really understand, this is a parody/crack fic. And I don't own, nor have made cup holders, those belong to, well, who ever made cup holders. I also don't own Zoids. Enjoy!)

One day, I suddenly awoke on the planet Zi! What a surprise! Well, I did what anyone would do if they found themselves in a strange new world they somehow knew about. I ran around in a circle screaming in panic as everyone I ever knew or loved where either currently dead, or never existed. Well, after crying and running for an hour, I finally faced facts; I was on my own. So, I decided what I had to do. I needed to get citizenship.

Well, after lying and bagging for about a month while living off handouts (I somehow found myself outside a big city), I finally got my citizenship. I was an official, registered citizen of the Helic Republic. This meant I could do things like vote, or join the military, even pilot a Zoid. But more importantly, it meant I could get a job. So, I found work at a small diner, and pretty much lived off the minimal wage I received. But it was a living, and the money I did't spend on food or the rent to the crappy apartment I rented went to my "secret fund". And sure enough, I one day had enough money in this "fund" to change Zi forever, for I, Zoids Fanatic was going to file a patent on the first ever cup holders for Zoids! Sure, they laughed when I made the request, but they where shown wrong, for the cup holders in the Zoids became a big hit, and I was soon raking in the fruits of my labor.

It was around this time that Van Flyheight had begun his quest, but I didn't care, cause I was ranking in the dough. But soon enough, I "vanished" from the scene, still getting money from my cup holders, of course. For you see, as I knew Zoids, I knew of the destruction that was to happen. And when it finally happened (two years later) I was the first to jump on the scene, using some of my wealth to start a charity foundation in order to help the people of Zi. Money for this foundation starting flowing in, and I has boosted to world-wide status. Of course, I mainly kept out of the spotlight, as to not draw to much attention to myself.

Around the same time, the military was trying to rebuild it's Zoid forces. And while this was going smoothly, I decided to pitch about my Zoid cup holders. It worked, and soon, my cup holders began to appear in many military Zoids. Later on in life, I bought the rights to the title of the book "My Life", by Van Flyheight, and made it into a movie, which gained a cult following, and positive reviews. And that's my story!

The end.


End file.
